not sad

tonight I am very subdued, very quiet and polite, slow and depressed. but by depressed I don’t mean sad. when I feel this way all I can do is either lie anywhere, floors and benches are good, and stare, or go for a walk. but around the block or to the milk bar’s no good, it has to be at least a 50 kilometre walk.

if some dearly beloved one’s eyes were burnt out of their skull five seconds away all I could do is watch.

today today today I can look upon with utmost detachment. I went to Smithfield to refill my prescription and bank two cheques. I banked one, but the other was an American one, and there was a line for that counter, so I went to visit mumm at work. just at her lunch break! so I had lunch with her, and since she works in a bank, she banked my American cheque for me without having to pay the $20 conversion fee or wait in a line. it is handy to have friends in high places.

then I went to the theatre at Cairns Central, which was odd, because I usually go to the City one. and who should I run into there but Sarah Joy, who hardly ever goes to the theatre, and when she does, usually goes to the Earlville one. what a very odd and suspicious coincidence.

then I went to the library, and got eight books, only one of which i’ve previously read. I walked all the way home from the library, which took about three hours, so I suppose that’s when my mood started.

then I went to the.. to. to be, to bed, to stare.