frightening

the most frightening of days. i’ve been trying to fix an email problem, as well as set up the last of my accounts on the new servers. all of which is harrowingly stressifying enough, without my computer having conniptions and simply refusing to run for longer than 10 minutes at a time. I think when it died last time I should have had someone look at it. so I will this time, and have already made backups 29X, so there.

meanwhile I had a mini breakdown and ran away for a while, coming to my senses halfway to Smithfield. only 6 lanes. I wish we had those signs with people racing across, dragging their children.. I would have been tempted to try it, if I had children, and a man two-heads taller to bravely lead the way, like ducks crossing right at the duck crossing sign.
overcome with shame I nearly didn’t come back! last night I noticed a twinge in my knee, and after stumbling 10million miles it hurts quite a bit…

neither highs nor lows would be great; I mean how many highs do you have anyway?

from my out-and-about book

in the city today, crossing a busy! intersection, I noticed a bird standing right in the centre of it, unmoving, no matter how close the whizzing death-boxes came. I crossed back to the other side to get a closer look and saw it was a myna bird with blood filled eyes, rumpled and sore. several of the passing death-boxes slowed, passengers hanging out of windows to peer at the thing before resuming their inconsequence-ridden way. I sat on a bench and stared at it for 43 minutes, during which time it only twitched now and then, or swayed with the windblasts of speeding.. death-boxes. I couldn’t bring myself to run out there and pick it up, and thought it would probably thank me by pecking off my fingers anyway, so I finally got up and walked away. it’s probably still there. I feel terrible.

soap opera family

Bronwyn’s case was in the newspaper. that was what she was most afraid of.. everyone knowing!

Sarah’s formal was tonight, she’s staying in a (hugely giant) hotel room with friends for it so I went there to help her get ready and take pictures. she was afraid her dress made her look fat.. and it did. I lied of course, and it was very pretty! she looked much better than her friends, one of them wore the most ghastly hotpink puffy thing…

afterwards mumm told me she was sad because she felt it was the “beginning of the end,” and she poured her heart out about things I can’t say on my website. 🙂 I always felt our (extended) family was so strange, and would compare it to soap opera families rather than Real families, because it seemed so over the top; the outrages and secrets. but to anyone else our family seems perfect and like any other, so I realised just last night that all families really are like soap opera families… they just don’t let it out of the family!