I am not feeling very confident about my exam tomorrow. studying didn’t commence until this afternoon, and although i’ve memorised 3-4 pages so far, it doesn’t feel like much. it doesn’t feel adequate. I have 2 pages to go, which I will try to finish before I sleep. tomorrow morning I will try to cram more in. but. hmm. it’s because I didn’t do so spectacularly on the midsemester for this subject, only getting a Credit. it’s because this subject barely interests me.

it would be much easier if we didn’t have such a break between end of semester and end of semester exams. one week into the break and I feel my cognitive ability has declined to that of an 8year old. and my experiment design exam isn’t until the 28th! by then I will be an embryo!

I study cross-legged on my bed with a canvas-board across my knees as a desk, using all the ripped out leftover pages of my lecture books. door locked, window shut, air conditioner on, wordless music or dead can dance playing. sugarless gum. an hour-long break every hour.

yesterday I managed to rescue a half-chewed marsupial-mouse from the playfully murderous claws of Lila. I put it in a box for the night, to see if it would survive. today it escaped and Lila ate it. she crunched it between her giant jaws of death while I tried to pry them open. the big stupid dumb thing. she crushed it to death. when I saw its limp wet head poke out of her mouth I knew it was dead, and let her have it. then Sarah kicked her in the abdomen and tied her up. it had been getting better, limping about and eating peanuts; better enough to escape.

I went down to the surgery and picked up my prescription. she didn’t charge me. then I went to the pharmacy around the corner and filled it. $3.75 for a piece of mind.