gosh, how tired I am. but Nip/Tuck is on soon! i’m afraid I like it.
I have circles under my eyes which are permanent. if I tilt my head a certain way, so that light falls into them, they disappear, and I look much nicer.
I went to Freshwater today, last minute decision. wow! I like it there so much. the house I used to live in has been painted. the neighbours still live there, and still have nasty geese. I went to the creek and felt so.. hmm. there is a road to get to the creek through the sugar cane, it used to calm me so to walk along it until by the time I reached the creek I could lie down and die. well they’ve widened it, so now more cars use it, so it’s lost that effect.
but the creek looks just the same, exactly. same fallen trees. I once was nearly swept away when it was flooded, but grabbed onto one of those trees and hung on until I was rescued. there was a very deep, swirling spot were the creek turned a corner, beneath a small cliff with a tree growing over that had a swinging rope tied on. I was always scared there would be a crocodile at the bottom of that spot. I saw one further up, once, though only a very small one. and there is a root that twists out of the ground and back into it, like a handle, and I saw fairies swinging off it once, and sitting on it.
and once, while walking along the creek on a path hardly anyone even now knows about, a man rode by me on a bicycle, completely naked. five minutes later he tapped me on the shoulder (he must have called, but I was listening to music), and silly me, I turned around. he was still naked.
you know, I think I live anywhere but now. everywhere. once!